


love (with no regrets).

by constillations



Category: The Boyz (Korea Band)
Genre: Death, Other, Poison, content //, implied suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-08
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-14 13:02:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,686
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29917329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/constillations/pseuds/constillations
Summary: based off of reveal, catching fire.
Kudos: 4





	love (with no regrets).

There are only so many emotions that exist between the time of the dogs and wolves. They were granted to us to help us survive. Fear was created to help us run from our enemies. Anger was created to make us strong. Happiness was created so that we would have something worth living for. 

But out of all of these emotions that exist, love is the only one that does not have a clear purpose.

The first friendship was created out of fear. Fear that if two did not stick together, they would eventually become prey to other creatures roaming the world. 

The first newborn was created out of lust. Lust is necessary for reproduction; for the continuation of a species. Out of all emotions, lust is probably the most simple. It is meaningless, quick, and uncomplicated.

The first pair of lovers was created out of love. But what is the emotion love necessary for? It is not like lust or fear. Love does nothing to help you survive. It tears you apart and breaks you, yet it leaves you wanting more. It makes you foolish and stupid. 

And sometimes, it could even be the reason why you die.

“Bring him forward,” a voice booms across the square.

The crowd breaks apart, and gasps erupt from the people standing closest to the forming rift in the group as they fall back in fear. 

From the gap in the crowd emerges four men, ropes strung over their shoulders, dragging with all of their might. They are decently sized men, strong and able, yet they still struggle to pull along the soon-to-be executed person. They move forward, but the process is extremely slow and painful.

Former Crown Prince Sangyeon follows them, straining against all four men with such force that one of them lets out a cry of pain and spits out blood. Nonetheless, the job must be done. 

It takes even more work to tie him down. His torn clothing is littered with black and red from blood and soot. When he looks up, his dark eyes are visible from underneath his matted brown hair.

The look in his eyes makes several people in the crowd flinch, though not from fear. The pain emulated from his irises is visible to anyone who lays their eyes on him. The look in his eyes is the look of a man who is about to take his last breath. A man who has accepted his fate. Yet they are the look of a man who does not have any regrets.

This is a different Sangyeon. But when your eyes meet his, you can see through your tear-clouded vision that this is at the same time, the Sangyeon you always knew. He’s broken, but he’s still full of love for you. His passion surrounds him like the rings of Saturn, shines like the rays of the sun, and feels more powerful than a thunderstorm raging whenever the God of the Sky loses yet another one of his mortal lovers to the hands of a monster. 

_ I love you. I will never stop loving you and I would die if it means that I can take my last breath still knowing that my heart is yours and yours only. _

You can remember the very first day he saw you. You were always weak and fragile, and it didn’t help that you had been brought to the palace to join the royal harem. In fact, shame hung around you like a curtain. Trading your honor to be clothed and fed. But you had no other choice. You’d starve otherwise.

Being cleaned and clothed in sparkling silks and ordered to dance gracefully amongst the other new members of the harem in front of dukes and duchesses, barons and knights struck fear in your heart. Dancing wasn’t easy. _ One foot in front of the other, move like a swan. _

You felt that you moved more like a stork. None of the royals took any interest in you. 

None of them except him. You met his eyes, and immediately flinched and looked away. 

He wasn’t scary, he just intimidated you. He was dashingly handsome, with a sculpted face and broad shoulders. He was younger at that time, but he still carried himself with an aura of regality.

And because of that, he was the last person you expected to walk through your chamber doors that day. As he came closer, you began to tremble in fear, and as he reached out in worry, you burst into tears. But at that second, you felt strong arms hold you in a comforting embrace. 

“Shhhh, don’t cry,” he whispered.

“I don’t want to,” you sobbed. “Please.”

“Shhh, it’s okay,” he said, stroking your hair. “I won’t.”

The moon is full that night. Moonlight spills into the chamber through the window, making his face visible in the darkness. You’re faced with gentle eyes and a kind smile. He brushes the hair away from your face and gently moves you so that you are facing the window. 

Neither of you sleep. The sky is too vast and endless, and there are an endless amount of stars to count. There, in the dead of night, he can feel his chest rise and fall, the beating of his heart, and his hand holding yours and rubbing calming circles on your palms. 

“I am sorry, sir.”

“Do not be sorry,” he says. “I am the one who should be sorry.”

In that moment, it was not completely clear why he’s apologizing, but it eventually became clear later on that his kind heart was what drew him to you.

He told you every single day that you’re beautiful, but you didn’t believe him. You didn’t have the smooth skin that the princesses have, or the beautiful curves that the others in the harem have, or the angelic face that the waiting ladies in the courtroom possess. You believed at first that he was lying. It took a while to understand why he was telling the truth.

And slowly, you started to believe it, too.

In those days, he was just Sangyeon, and you were just you. When your status is low, everyone above you becomes a blur. You only knew that he was of some high status. 

It never dawned on you that he was heir to the throne. 

He never told you either. Nearing the days of the coronation, he becomes distant, and the night before, he comes to you.

“I’m sorry,” he begged. “Please forgive me, I never meant to lie to you. I only wanted to protect you. To protect us.”

For once in your life, you had power. He was on his knees, holding your hands in his, looking up at you. Him, the crown prince, soon to be the king of an entire kingdom, was kneeling in front of you, a pathetic excuse of a lower class human being who was once considered to be just above the status of a slave. You had the entire world at your command. It was right in front of you, holding your hands and begging for your forgiveness.

How could you not forgive him?

“I will make you mine,” he promised softly, holding your hands to his lips. “If it’s the last thing I do.”

But it turns out that the world had other plans for him.

The two of you decide to make plans against the world’s plans. But none of those plans work out, and they end with your face plastered on wanted posters all over the kingdom. Wanted, dead or alive. And usually, when one is wanted dead or alive, it is often intended for them to end up dead.

In the kingdom, it is also a crime punishable by death to be an accomplice in a crime. In Sangyeon’s case, he was not only going to be punished for helping you hide, but also for loving you. Even as he was captured and forced to give away your whereabouts, he didn’t give away a single clue as to where you were.

This is a kingdom taboo. What he did was unforgivable.

But when the executioner asks him to say his final words, he raises his head to look straight into your eyes. “No matter what kills me,” he says. “I will regret none of it.”

It takes you a moment to realize that he is not only about to die, but he is about to die for you. You want to cry out and object, but something freezes you into position. Your eyes water, but you know there is nothing you can do about it. Even if you were to object now, you can’t do anything about it.

But that isn’t the thing stopping you.

As you look into Sangyeon’s eyes, you can see that this is what he wants. He wants you to be alive, to have the chance at life that would be taken away from him in the next hour. You can’t bear to let him die knowing that his death was for nothing. You love him, far too much to hurt him that way. And you know that he loves you too, too much to force you to live a life where you have to see him give the love he saved for you to someone else.

When he’s gone, you turn and walk back to your seaside hideout. It seems colder than usual when you get back, and you almost expect him to be sitting there waiting for you.

But there’s no one. You try to look for any trace of him, but when you find nothing, you fall to the ground and cry.

It’s then that you take out the vial of poison that you purchased previously.

“I’m sorry,” you whisper. “I’m sorry for lying to you.”

Love was a fault in the creation of humanity. It makes us imperfect, but it makes us who we are. It makes us weak, but it makes us human. 

It is pointless, unreasonable, and stupid. But you would do it all over again, with no regrets.


End file.
